Multiple Personality Disorder

I think that all horses suffer from multiple personality disorder.  Time and again, riders feel the need to have different names for the different versions of their horses.  This accurate understanding of the psychotic quirky nature of horses was brought to my attention by Hillary in a much older post of hers, and then while I was mulling over this post, again by L. Williams with Ramone.

Walker #1

Walker is no saint among horses, and he too suffers from multiple personalities.  I have whittled them down to three:

1) There is Walker, the horse I know and love.  He rocks.

2) There is lazy Walker.  Lazy Walker has fights over simple things like asking him to trot when you want him to, or dare I say canter a straight line.  Lazy Walker would much rather expend ALL of his energy trying to avoid expending any energy.  Lazy Walker is the basis for all my frustrations and the main reason why I don't believe in the phrase "better lazy than crazy".  BETTER CRAZY!  At least crazy horses move.

Walker #3 - notice the crazy eye

3)  Then there is bolting Walker.  Bolting Walker is kind of like a crazy Walker, but he is also an unhealthy mix of lazy Walker and crazy Walker.  Bolting Walker bolts, and bolting Walker cannot be stopped.  I can feel it happening, and I can try to prevent it, but once we're bolting, we just go until he decides to stop.  It has become a surreal thing for me because I just sit on his back now and let him fly like a lunatic at full speed around an arena like I'm out for a Sunday drive on my pony and I accidentally hit the gas.  Bolting Walker frustrates me in a completely different way because it is the one maneuver that truly does get him out of work.  He knows that now, which is why it's his favourite move, and I spend entire rides like a schizophrenic on edge waiting for it to happen.

My god, horses are wonderful.

I'll be taking appropriate name suggestions for these other versions of his personality.  Fire away!