Beating Myself Up

We riders are pretty hard on ourselves, and I think it's safe to say that most of us are perfectionists.  It just seems to go with the business, the constant need to better ourselves and the nagging feeling that we're just not there yet.

I get this way a lot, especially when I dream about buying a second horse.  Whenever I think about buying a hunter/jumper or something similar to make up for Walker's lack of talent in some areas, I usually end up in a funk thinking that even if I had the money to buy a second horse, I probably would just ruin it.

I used to think I ruined Walker.  He's not as light in the mouth as he used to be, and sometimes I worry if he's spur-dead because of his training or because of my riding.  In fairness to me, I actually do think his training contributed much more than my riding, but I do know that he's not as light in the mouth.  This is for several reasons, one of which is simply that we don't ride in big bits anymore and he was never that light in the mouth in gentler bits anyway.  But still there's that nagging feeling that goes on in the back of your mind.

In the Dressage book, Jane Savoie is all about positivity and self-fulfilling prophecies.  She's right of course.  If we don't believe in ourselves, we probably will fail.

Last night I also watched Buck again.  I've been in a horse-themed movie watching spree, probably because I have been in a horse-themed book reading spree and because I have no horse to ride.  Anyway, I realized that Buck is a pretty positive person too.

I also found this article the other day and realized that successful people just need to be happy.

Horses are about kindness - kindness to horses, kindness to others, kindness to ourselves.

There is no room for negative thoughts.